Hey, I've just got a quick note for you today on a subject that a lot of guys are curious about: How to talk to women. There's a lot of cool information I teach you, from routines to openers, conversation bridges, all kinds of great stuff to inject into your interactions with women. But in almost every single one-on-one coaching (and in hundreds of emails I get every day), one concern stands out more than any other.
It just feels hard, not easy at all and when that happens, you end up repelling women way more often than you will attract them. And if you make it a habit to repel women, where does that really get you?
A lot of men will resort to compliments when they don't know what to say or they are trying too hard to telegraph their attraction to a woman and the problem with that is, you really aren't saying much at all when you do that. You have to be able to speak about things other than telling her that she is attractive because otherwise, you are not going to stand out and make that lasting impression on her that you need to. Trust me, if you think she looks good, so do LOTS of other guys. So, she has heard all of those compliments before.
Showing her that you have some shared interests is one of the BEST ways to get her feeling like she wants to exchange phone numbers or spend time with you later. If she feels that you and her have some things in common, that becomes something that you can talk about that leads to her wanting to spend time with you. So, find some of those common interests as quickly as you can.Angelica was a gorgeous 24 year old graduate student who had asked me this question: "Why don't men know how to talk to women?"
They just want to get away. Someone who seems down is just going to drag you down, so again, it is just going to make you want to get away. However, if you have a lot of POSITIVE energy - now that is enticing and addicting and contagious as well. Only, this is the kind of energy that is going to make her want to stay around you.
A conversational bridge is a way of bringing up a topic that you want to steer the conversation towards. Let's say you know you want to talk about your passions and interests with a woman, and you've thought of a great way to bring it up and talk about it. And, let's say your passion is photography.You have a couple ways you could bring it up in conversation, like: "You know, I was just thinking as I'm looking at you that you would make a fantastic subject for photography. Have you ever thought about doing a sitting?" You could also bring it up without focusing on her by saying:
"I was out scouting locations for some photos today. The light here is really fantastic for bringing out skin tones and eye color. Isn't it great?" Okay, so now we've got a couple ways to bring up our interests in conversation, without bragging AND at the same time communicating to a woman that you've got a hobby in your life that brings out your passion.Maybe you've got some great questions to ask, and things to say that you think of when you're at home, but now you need to have it ready all the time, like a loaded gun. You want to be able to come up with this when you're out and about, but you find yourself constantly forgetting it when the pressure is on.How to talk to women - STEP 2: ENGAGE YOUR MODALITIES Modalities are simply your senses. Sight, smell, hearing, taste, and touch. The more of your senses you use, the quicker things are embedded in your mind. So you want to spend some time before you go out writing these words down, whether it's the questions you want to ask, or just a list of topics you want to bring up in conversation.
They seek validation, some seek to have their egos strokes, and some of them actually want to genuinely someone that they feel they can connect with. It's far easier than you think, but first you have to unlearn what you have learned (I think I heard that in some movie somewhere).
The amount of pressure that you put on yourself when you feel like you have to be really smooth is just going to make the task of starting a conversation seem more difficult than it has to be. All you really have to do is focus on talking to her and engaging her in such a way that the conversation continues. Way too often, guys will put unnecessary pressure on themselves because they think that they have to be smooth when all you really have to do is be natural.
Of course, you do want to talk about yourself or what you like a little bit, but you don't want to talk so much about yourself that you come across as self involved or not really caring about her.
It really is all in your head. Talking to women is as easy as talking to a kid, your friend, or that nice senior citizen. Once I stopped buying into some of societies ridiculous beliefs, such as a really attractive person is better than someone who is not (who judges this anyway?) or that a stranger can actually reject you, then I started having less fear and taking more action.
(I used to do this all the time, and make up some pretty crazy conversations to see if I could get people around me to listen in. "He hit the cop with a baseball bat??? No WAY!" Try it sometime... it's better than prank phone calling.) The point of this is that you must get out there and put yourself in as many DIFFERENT situations where you have to recall the information you're trying to memorize. The more situations you find to rehearse in, the better you'll be when it counts - in front of a woman.By using my technique, you activate millions more neurons in your brain, which commits the words DEEP into your memory. And then this helps you pull out the words when you really need to, and you won't have any of those embarrassing gaps and silences in your conversations with women.
[How To Talk To Women]
It just feels hard, not easy at all and when that happens, you end up repelling women way more often than you will attract them. And if you make it a habit to repel women, where does that really get you?
A lot of men will resort to compliments when they don't know what to say or they are trying too hard to telegraph their attraction to a woman and the problem with that is, you really aren't saying much at all when you do that. You have to be able to speak about things other than telling her that she is attractive because otherwise, you are not going to stand out and make that lasting impression on her that you need to. Trust me, if you think she looks good, so do LOTS of other guys. So, she has heard all of those compliments before.
Showing her that you have some shared interests is one of the BEST ways to get her feeling like she wants to exchange phone numbers or spend time with you later. If she feels that you and her have some things in common, that becomes something that you can talk about that leads to her wanting to spend time with you. So, find some of those common interests as quickly as you can.Angelica was a gorgeous 24 year old graduate student who had asked me this question: "Why don't men know how to talk to women?"
They just want to get away. Someone who seems down is just going to drag you down, so again, it is just going to make you want to get away. However, if you have a lot of POSITIVE energy - now that is enticing and addicting and contagious as well. Only, this is the kind of energy that is going to make her want to stay around you.
A conversational bridge is a way of bringing up a topic that you want to steer the conversation towards. Let's say you know you want to talk about your passions and interests with a woman, and you've thought of a great way to bring it up and talk about it. And, let's say your passion is photography.You have a couple ways you could bring it up in conversation, like: "You know, I was just thinking as I'm looking at you that you would make a fantastic subject for photography. Have you ever thought about doing a sitting?" You could also bring it up without focusing on her by saying:
"I was out scouting locations for some photos today. The light here is really fantastic for bringing out skin tones and eye color. Isn't it great?" Okay, so now we've got a couple ways to bring up our interests in conversation, without bragging AND at the same time communicating to a woman that you've got a hobby in your life that brings out your passion.Maybe you've got some great questions to ask, and things to say that you think of when you're at home, but now you need to have it ready all the time, like a loaded gun. You want to be able to come up with this when you're out and about, but you find yourself constantly forgetting it when the pressure is on.How to talk to women - STEP 2: ENGAGE YOUR MODALITIES Modalities are simply your senses. Sight, smell, hearing, taste, and touch. The more of your senses you use, the quicker things are embedded in your mind. So you want to spend some time before you go out writing these words down, whether it's the questions you want to ask, or just a list of topics you want to bring up in conversation.
They seek validation, some seek to have their egos strokes, and some of them actually want to genuinely someone that they feel they can connect with. It's far easier than you think, but first you have to unlearn what you have learned (I think I heard that in some movie somewhere).
The amount of pressure that you put on yourself when you feel like you have to be really smooth is just going to make the task of starting a conversation seem more difficult than it has to be. All you really have to do is focus on talking to her and engaging her in such a way that the conversation continues. Way too often, guys will put unnecessary pressure on themselves because they think that they have to be smooth when all you really have to do is be natural.
Of course, you do want to talk about yourself or what you like a little bit, but you don't want to talk so much about yourself that you come across as self involved or not really caring about her.
It really is all in your head. Talking to women is as easy as talking to a kid, your friend, or that nice senior citizen. Once I stopped buying into some of societies ridiculous beliefs, such as a really attractive person is better than someone who is not (who judges this anyway?) or that a stranger can actually reject you, then I started having less fear and taking more action.
(I used to do this all the time, and make up some pretty crazy conversations to see if I could get people around me to listen in. "He hit the cop with a baseball bat??? No WAY!" Try it sometime... it's better than prank phone calling.) The point of this is that you must get out there and put yourself in as many DIFFERENT situations where you have to recall the information you're trying to memorize. The more situations you find to rehearse in, the better you'll be when it counts - in front of a woman.By using my technique, you activate millions more neurons in your brain, which commits the words DEEP into your memory. And then this helps you pull out the words when you really need to, and you won't have any of those embarrassing gaps and silences in your conversations with women.
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